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DuPage County family law attorneysWhether you have been divorced for years, or you are only starting the process of ending your marriage, separated parents have many challenges during the holidays. You may feel like it is nearly impossible to get through Christmas, Hanukah, Kwanzaa or other special holidays as a divorced person. However, experts do have some tips for divorced parents which may make your holiday season a little more manageable.

Avoid Bottling Up Your Emotions

Many parents who get divorced are hyper-focused on how the divorce will affect their children. While making sure your children are comfortable is an admirable and important part of being a parent, experts say divorced parents should be careful not to neglect their own emotional needs. Many people experience divorce in a similar way to loss. If you are ending your marriage, you may experience feelings of anger, grief, despair, and even relief. Talking about these feelings with a trusted friend or therapist can help you manage them.

Treat Yourself to Something You Enjoy

The holidays are often thought of as mostly pertaining to children. However, many divorce experts and psychologists encourage adults to get into the holiday spirit if they are able. Treating yourself to a day at the spa, a delicious meal, or simply just relaxing at home can help divorced parents cope with the emotional burden of the holidays.

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Wheaton divorce attorneysIf you are a parent and are considering filing for divorce, you are probably concerned about how the divorce will affect your child. Divorce is a challenging obstacle for anyone to overcome, and children are no exception. However, the good news is that research shows that children are remarkably resilient and with special care, children whose parents divorce can be just as happy and successful as those children whose parents stayed together.

Research Leaves Divorced Parents Hopeful

Distinguished psychologist Constance Ahrons conducted a 20-year study about children of divorce. Through her research, she found that about 80 percent of children of divorce are able to adapt to the divorce and lead happy, successful lives afterward. Put another way, the majority of children whose parents get divorced do not experience permanent damaging effects on their mental and physical wellbeing. Another piece of evidence comes from developmental psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington from the University of Virginia. She, through a study of 2,500 children of divorce, came to similar conclusions about the effect of divorce on children. In fact, the vast majority of research by child development experts and psychologists have found that divorce alone does not hurt children’s social development, mental health, or school performance in the long run.

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DuPage County family law attorneysGenetics play a large role in our physical appearance, our health, and many other aspects of our lives. Of course, so does the environment in which we live. For decades—if not longer—researchers have been exploring the impact of what is colloquially known as “nature vs. nurture” on a wide variety of human behaviors. Forming healthy interpersonal relationships would seem to fall into the category of learned behaviors—or nurture—but new evidence suggests that genetics may have an effect as well. Divorce, it appears, may be genetic and runs in families as a result.

A New Look

Researchers from Virginia Commonwealth University collaborated with a team from Lund University in Sweden on a project that examined the relationships of adopted children, their adoptive parents, and their biological parents. The study looked to test the widely held belief that children of divorced parents are more likely to divorce simply because that is what they know and are conditioned to see as normal.

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DuPage County divorce attorneyWhether we like it or not, tax issues are a part of any divorce. This is especially complex to navigate when the divorce involves high-income spouses and high-value assets. The stakes are often higher when large marital estates have to be divided, and if it is not done in accordance with relevant tax law, the IRS can take a distressing amount in recompense.

Standard and Complex Questions

Even in an average divorce, there are multiple tax issues that might become apparent. Some of the most common include deciding who will claim the children on future tax returns, determining whether to file as joint/married or single if your proceedings are happening during tax season, answering any residency-related questions, and so on. These same issues often arise in high-value divorces as well, but because the value of the marital estate is higher, it is more common for wealthy couples to discuss such issues beforehand—in a prenuptial agreement, for example. If this is not done, tax considerations may be handled along with the more specific issues at the time of the divorce.

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250 W. River Drive, Unit 2A
St. Charles, IL 60174
630-665-7300
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From our law office in Wheaton, IL the family law and civil litigation law attorneys of Mirabella, Kincaid, Frederick and Mirabella, represent businesses and individual clients throughout the western suburbs of Chicago, Illinois including Wheaton, Naperville, Oak Brook, Glen Ellyn, Carol Stream, Lombard, Downers Grove, Burr Ridge, Lisle, Elmhurst, Oakbrook Terrace, Winfield, Woodridge, Warrenville and throughout DuPage, Kane and Kendall Counties.

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