Regardless of the circumstances, getting a divorce can have a dramatic impact on your mental wellbeing. Divorce can bring on feelings of failure, despair, and anxiety about the future. Some people end up developing unhealthy coping mechanisms in order to deal with the torrent of emotion following the end of a marriage. Although going through a divorce can be extremely stressful, it is not only possible to get through the rough times most people end up much happier and healthier than they were before the divorce. Mental health experts encourage anyone going through a stressful divorce to avoid these common mistakes.

Mistake 1: Being Too Hard on Yourself

If you are an overachiever, have children to care for, or have a demanding career, you may not take time for yourself very often. Mental health specialists encourage those ending a marriage to give themselves a break. Do not expect yourself to be able to function at 100 percent when you are dealing with the emotional and financial burden of a divorce. Just as your body needs rest after a physical injury, your mind needs time to heal after an emotionally-trying time too.

Mistake 2: Isolating Yourself

Many people feel a great deal of shame and sadness when they end a marriage. They may also worry that people will judge them or be disappointed in them. This can lead people to turn inward and stop spending time with family and friends. However, isolating yourself in this way can make the pain of divorce even worse. The American Psychological Association encourages those getting divorced to find a strong social network and consider joining a divorce support group in order to cope with the difficulties of divorce.

Money-related concerns are often one of the most crucial aspects of a divorce. In Illinois, property is distributed according to equitable distribution laws. Instead of the marital estate being divided exactly 50/50, Illinois courts consider a wide variety of factors and then divide marital property fairly based on the spouses’ economic and life circumstances. However, when the court does not have accurate financial information from a spouse, the divorce settlement may not be equitable. There are many warning signs of financial fraud during divorce that could mean your spouse is attempting to manipulate the divorce process to gain an unfair advantage.

What is Financial Fraud?

A spouse commits financial fraud when he or she does not fully and accurately disclose financial information like assets, income, and debts for the purposes of asset division, child support, and/or spousal maintenance during divorce. One of the most common forms of financial fraud occurs when a spouse hides assets or sources of income. For example, a spouse may “forget” to declare a piece of real estate he or she owns or fail to report all revenue streams. He or she may have hidden funds in an offshore account or use his or her business to conceal assets. Some spouses will also try to manipulate the divorce settlement in his or her favor by fraudulently overstating debts and expenses.

Warning Signs that a Spouse is Lying About Financial Information

In many marriages, one spouse manages the couple’s finances and takes care of paying the bills with little input from the other spouse. It can be especially easy for a spouse to commit financial fraud in a situation like this. Indications that your spouse may be lying about finances include but are not limited to:

When you are deeply in love with your spouse, it can be nearly impossible to imagine that your spouse would ever do anything to hurt you, let alone cheat on you. To be fair, episodes of infidelity are rarely the result of a person intentionally looking to cause pain for their spouse or committed romantic partner. In many cases, in fact, unfaithfulness is often the manifestation of much deeper problems in the relationship, including a lack of communication, feelings of isolation, and discontent with one another. Infidelity, however, may be the last straw that leads the offended spouse to file for divorce, often with the expectation that such behavior may afford him or her additional considerations in the divorce process.

Limited Legal Impact

It is completely understandable that a spouse whose partner is guilty of infidelity would feel betrayed and angry and would wish to hold the cheating party accountable for his or her behavior. If you ever found yourself in that type of situation, it would only seem fair for your spouse to be responsible for breaking up your marriage in that way. Unless you and your spouse negotiated an infidelity clause in a valid prenuptial or postnuptial agreement, however, you are most likely going to be out of luck, at least as far the law is concerned.

Infidelity, along with all other negative or destructive behaviors like mental or physical cruelty or abandonment, can no longer be used as official grounds for divorce in Illinois. Recent changes to the law provide that all divorces in the state are to be granted on the grounds of irreconcilable differences, regardless of what may have occurred during the marriage. The law also prohibits a divorce judge from considering a spouse’s “misconduct” when dividing marital property or deciding whether to award spousal maintenance (alimony).

Ending a marriage is difficult no matter who you are, but those getting divorced after not working outside of the home in many years face added challenges. If you are considering divorce and are a homemaker or stay-at-home mother or father, you probably have many questions. Will I be awarded spousal support even if I initiate the divorce? How can I find a job to support myself without work experience? Will I receive additional child support because I do not have a job?

The answer to many of these questions will depend on your unique circumstances. If you are a stay-at-home parent or have otherwise not worked outside of the home and plan to divorce, there are a few things you should keep in mind.

You May Qualify for Spousal Maintenance

When deciding whether or not to award spousal maintenance, Illinois courts consider many factors. These include, but are not limited to:

The National Survey on Drug Use and Health reports that approximately 19.7 million adults in the U.S had a substance abuse disorder in 2017. Millions of other individuals struggle with other types of addictions such as gambling addiction or compulsive shopping.

If you are considering ending your marriage through divorce and your spouse is an addict, you will likely face a more challenging divorce than most. There are certain things you should keep in mind when divorcing a person with a substance abuse or addiction issue so that you can protect yourself both emotionally and financially.

Gather Important Financial Documents

Getting divorced is the end of a romantic relationship but it is also the end of a financial relationship. If you plan to divorce, make sure you collect important financial records including: